4:35 pm
True talent has a way of rising to the surface in any environment, like cream rising to the top of milk. I read a story about these World War 1 soldiers who spent days, weeks, and even months in dirt trenches, fighting the enemy in trenches of their own on the other side of the field of battle. As you might imagine, there was a lot of down time when they had nothing going on, didn’t quite feel the need to raise their head out of the tunnel to receive a third eye courtesy of the enemy snipers so they had to pass the time. Some of these soldiers were artists in their former lives and some had taken to painting scenes depicting the battles they fought onto helmets of their fallen comrades. In the worst environment the world knew at the time, Art still found a way to withstand the test. I think that stands for any true talent, no matter the situation, it has a way of finding its way out. If you are incredibly lucky, you may be blessed with one of these talents. I was given 2.
The first is that I can hack into pretty much any computer I want to. I couldn’t explain how I do it if I tried, had 2 lifetimes and 3 computer experts. I just see the code, I don’t know how else to describe it. If you look at a forest, do you see a blanket of green, or do you see each tree, branch and leaf? I see the molecules that make up the whole forest… I am sure it is like someone who can play piano by ear, you just have the ability, it can’t be taught.
The second talent I was given was a form of “reverse empathy”. Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. Reverse empathy means I can understand your feelings, know how something will affect you, and the ability to unflinchingly use all of that against you, preferably violently. As stated earlier, I was born that way so don’t go getting all high and mighty on me. I found a positive way to use this second talent as I have shown repeatedly working with our guests. We get results and that is because you have to know where to apply the pressure so to speak. Let me give you an example, or 4.
You would think that guys who pull off high end break ins would have a decent security system on their own place but I guess it is like the cobbler’s family having no shoes or something equally stupid. Good news for us though, more time for the reverse empathy. After making our way inside the house of X-ray, we quickly subdued 3 of the X-rays with a taser, some zip ties and a gag. I was searching for number 4 when I heard,
“I’m gonna cut you up fucker, you messed with the wrong man” He waived his little knife in my direction and I tried not to laugh at him. I simply replied,
“You would be better off using that thing to slit your own throat then point it at me, I’m only going to use it on you later in a much more painful manner.” I guess he isn’t a Rager because he just came right at me with that little pig sticker. He took a swipe across my chest and I backed up, let his arm pass, then kicked out the side of his knee. He hit the ground sideways and I stomped my booted foot on the hand holding the knife. It sounded just like a bowl of Rice Krispies when you add the milk. I picked up the knife and not so gently, stabbed it through his other hand. I tried to warn him but the line of people waiting to ignore our good advice just keeps getting longer. I secured the zip ties to what was left of his paws and since he wouldn’t stop crying like a little girl who dropped her ice cream, I stapled his lips together with a surgical stapler I got at…you guessed it, Amazon. How many of you just checked Amazon to see if they sold them? It just took too long to use the needle and thread like we did with the dickless trio, the Rage isn’t known for his patience…
We had the other 3 X-rays seated in the living room when I dragged what was left of knife boy into the room. That seemed to get their attention. I laid the knife and the stapler on the table in front of them and pulled a chair up so we could have a little get to know ya. 6 eyes were riveted to the items on the table as I explained to them that I needed to know who was behind their little criminal enterprise. Just like always, the leader piped up and started talking crap, threats, not sure what else because I picked up the knife and swiped it across his arm leaving a 9 inch cut, looked pretty deep. At least the idiot who brought a knife to a Rage fight sharpened it first.
That got the leader’s attention. I put the gag back in his mouth and stapled the wound shut. I really like that stapler! I laid the knife and stapler in front of the X-ray to the leader’s left as I asked the same question. He said he wouldn’t tell me and to go ahead and cut him. So, I took the knife and slashed it across the leader’s cheek. Muffled screams were coming out of the leader as I asked the same man one more time. I laid the tip of the knife in the leader’s crotch and looked to my man one last time. Now, leader was violently nodding his head up and down at the man sitting next to him, I can only assume giving his permission for his buddy to answer my questions. It took 3 seconds of hesitation and then I had my information.
Since these guys like to play with people’s ID’s, I had D round up all of their own ID’s and I sat there in the middle of the X-rays and hacked into all appropriate criminal and sexual predator websites and databases, I told you I have skills. Each of the X-rays is now a convicted pedophile and rapist. What assets they had were redistributed in Rage fashion to worthy causes. They are headed to prison so why not make sure they enjoy their stay. They will be quite popular.
D really liked Tango’s barbed wire Snuggy so we fashioned some restraints for the X-rays from the rest of the roll of barbed wire and notified local law enforcement that these gentlemen were regretting their life of crime and wanted to turn themselves in. D and I headed out to find the puppeteer. We modified the stolen data and had the leader transmit it to their boss, the next guest at Chateau De Simon. He won’t be writing a positive review of his stay.