9:15 pm
I’m pretty sure it was irony that invented the cock punch, or at the very least its snarky brother karma. I was doing some of my normal chores while listening to some “Feeling Way Too Damn Good” by Nickelback when it happened. A weird feeling came over me and then I heard, or maybe felt, D’s footsteps coming down the dock toward me. The boy is part Ninja so for me to sense his approach, something was going on. I saw the crazed look in his eyes as he approached and my heart stopped, something was terribly wrong. My first instinct was that something had happened to my lady. By the time D got done explaining what had happened, I truly understood the lyrics to the song.
Everything was going so well, I guess too well for the universe to stand by and let that happen. My lady is expecting our first child in a little over a month. I had finally convinced her to take on a reduced role at her work to lower her stress level and she was enjoying working part time while fixing up our new home. We purchased a small farm and we had all been busy remodeling and fixing up the old place to make it a home for our family, the soon to be 4 of us. 5 if you count Tango. The human biology experiment is still kicking…well, maybe not kicking, I had to remove one of his feet a while back, but he’s still breathing. At least he was.
I guess you want to know what has been going on these last 6 months, don’t you? Well, it has been peaceful and quiet, boring maybe. I’m not sure because I have never really had “down time” before, but that’s exactly what it was. The Rage turned all of his attention to our burgeoning family and has thrown himself into the restoration projects. He has also directed a good bit of his focus to training D. The boy is a natural and already has a very impressive set of skills , but the Rage has helped make him so much better. I haven’t driven a car since the day I found out I was going to be a father, which is a big part of why the Rage has had some down time. The plan was working flawlessly until of course, someone came along and fucked it all up.
This wasn’t your normal fuckery either, someone came at me and those I love and if you remember anything at all from our time together, don’t fuck with the Rage or anyone he loves, Rule #1. Apparently this, or these, particular assholes didn’t get the memo. No problem, when we are done with them it will be tattooed right on their asses. Then I’m going to pour a gallon of gas on them and light a match. Don’t you worry though, I will put a gas mask on them so they won’t inhale the smoke and flames and end their pain prematurely. No, they will get to enjoy every sizzling minute of the rest of their miserable lives. I may put out the fire and restart it a few times for effect. The Rage is back, you should have let him be…….
My lady is in a coma and my daughter was born a month prematurely and is clinging to life as we speak. You cannot possibly fathom the world of shit you just put yourself in. Enjoy the ride.