7:30 pm
Nikki’s Townhouse
Thankfully, Nikki was so busy yesterday and today contacting the families of the child killer victims and closing the open cases that she didn’t have much time to dwell on Simon, just every other second and all night long. Not much dwelling at all really. She was processing so many unfamiliar emotions that she was having a hard time telling up from down. The story of what Simon did to the killer was out almost as soon as it happened, no doubt thanks to the blog, and every single family member Nikki spoke to in the last 2 days asked her to thank Simon for what he did if she ever got a chance to speak with him. Little did they know. It only served to further complicate the feelings she was already battling. The other agents at the FBI were on cloud nine after closing this case, everyone takes a personal interest when someone is hurting children and it was a huge relief to everyone to have this case closed and the monster off the street. While Nikki shared in the excitement, she kept feeling like there was a huge sucking hole in the center of her chest, she missed Simon. Steeling her resolve, Nikki opened up an email and began,
“Dearest Simon,
I don’t know where to begin. Thank you for my pendant, it is beautiful and you couldn’t have picked anything better to remind me of you. I can’t believe you were in my house, my bedroom, the country’s most wanted criminal and all I can think is how much I would have loved to see you, heard your voice, smelled your scent, felt your arms around me. How crazy is that? It probably is better that you didn’t wake me because as much as you said you didn’t want to leave, I don’t know if I am strong enough to have let you leave even if you wanted to.
I went to the site where the truck was located, 4 of the victims are from an open case I was working. We didn’t connect the other 7 victims because they were from several states. I saw what you did to that man and as much as I tried to let revulsion, anger, and disgust take over, I couldn’t. I could only see the girls being tortured and I felt what I am sure is a fraction of the rage that you feel all the time. To be honest with you, you accomplished something that the FBI has been working toward for several years and wrapped it up into one nice bundle. Every family member I spoke with over the past days asked me to thank you for what you did.
Now to the subject I have been dancing around for the past several days, love. I thought I was in love when I was with David all those years ago, but in retrospect, I think it wasn’t. It wasn’t anything like I feel now, about you. I haven’t even met you and you are the most important person in my life, not my professional life, my life. I am so scared what that means for my future, for me, for you, but like you say, I don’t have much control over the feeling. I don’t know what all this means but I hope to one day figure it out. Please be safe.
Yours,
Nikki”
Nikki hit the send button and was staring into the webcam, absentmindedly rubbing the butterfly pendant between her fingers.