6:15 pm
The Rage and I took on some part time work, we have been hired as consultants. And before you start writing asking to hire the Rage, it doesn’t work like that. We have been asked to fix a problem and since you know that’s what we do, we agreed to help. This particular problem fits with our mission goal which is to make the world a better place for you. We also get to use our own brand of persuasion in doing so and I know that’s what you want to hear about so let’s tag this particular project as Tango and roll up our sleeves. Before we get into it though, remember that the rules, as always, will still be enforced. As they say in Maryland, drive gently, but please go the damn speed limit…..
I can’t go into too much detail due to the sensitivity of the project but let’s just say that Tango is taking something that doesn’t belong to him. Want to guess why? Deadly sin #1 of course…. To take something that is not yours is bad enough. To do so while putting the people of our great country in peril, you might as well spit in the Rage’s ice cream. It’s just not going to end well for you.
This particular thief, or thieves, I am after are not your garden variety thugs. They have been highly trained by the best there is. They have been trained to be invisible, to escape any situation, to resist any form of persuasion or torture. The only problem with this high level training is that they didn’t factor in the Rage. He invented invisible, he can sneak into your dreams and leave only a smile on your face on the way out. And if you think you can resist the pain and torture that the Rage has for you, you are sadly mistaken. Just ask Tango #1, the first unfortunate asshole that thought he was untouchable. Too bad the Rage is very touchy feely…..
Tango 1 was the proverbial boots on the ground, the grunt. This is the poor unfortunate soul who was tasked with the actual breaking and entering. You know where I am going with breaking and entering don’t you???? Yep, the Rage broke every one of his bones. All 206 of them. He actually told us what we wanted after 7…. It’s really hard reaching all of the metatarsals, the little bones in the feet. I had a lapidary hammer that belonged to my dad. I’m glad I found a use for it, not much of a rock hound myself but the Rage sure liked it. As with all criminal enterprises of this magnitude, there are layers. Time to start peeling…..you know what that makes me think of…..