11:45 am
Juliet comes to us via referral of sorts. I told you I had a reader write in and tell a tale of a drunk driver but I didn’t elaborate because I wanted to do my own research. I am glad I followed my instinct and looked this oozing dick lesion up because if anyone deserves to become a guest at Chateau De Simon, it is Juliet. First, the runny fart is an attorney: strike one. Second, he has been arrested for DUI 4 separate times, been to court only twice and both times plead out to a non-alcohol related charge so he can continue to drink and drive: Strike two. Lastly, I learned he owns stock in Sprint: game over! Did I mention that the last incident involved a fatality of a 17-year-old girl who was on her way home from working her shitty job in the fast food industry so she could save money to go to college? The girl was a straight A student with the whole world in front of her, or at least she was before Juliet came along and killed her by his selfish act. The rage and I have our own version of AA and Juliet is going to find out that ours is only a 2-step program: Pain and Death. Saved him 10 whole steps, do you think he will be appreciative?
Thankfully, Juliet is divorced, shocker, so we have a little leeway but unfortunately, we will need to leave a body so they can wrap up his estate. I would bet he made sure to fuck his family over, but you know Simon knows what to do in that case. My new hybrid transport vehicle is charged up and ready to go. Feels like a good time for an environmentally friendly night op.